All posts tagged: accident

Loving Into Being {Making It Home}

August 2011 He walked through the front door and breathed it in. Home. And I was told he place his small, little-boy hand on the wall and spoke the word, “Home.” I was not there. I was in the hospital, barely passing the hours of night and day by pressing the self-administering morphine button; I was holding the hope of home in my heart, living past the tragedy of the car accident apart from my family. And they were coming home. Daddy on crutches—the weight of so much unknown a harder thing to carry than a useless, broken leg—and our four kids were beginning to step back into normalcy. I was out of ICU, off of the machines that kept me breathing and recently established in the trauma ward. Just the entryway wall, already smudged with so many handprints. But this small caress and a one-syllable word made a picture she’ll carry forever. Home. He’d been staying at his aunt’s house for a week. In the whirlwind surrounding the accident, the youngest of our kids …

Running on Grace

You guys, I RAN! Today! In the middle of my two-mile walk to the end of picturesque Cherry Lane, I picked up my sneakered feet and started running! And kept on running!   A whole Quarter Mile. I heard the (albeit slow) plod-plod-plod-plod pace of my jogging on the gravely pavement, the huffing of my own hot breath, the wind in my ears and I got all out-of-breath and laughed and ran a little more! And seriously, with each step I thought of you dear people who helped, prayed, served, cooked, cared, loved me back from the brink of death and the helplessness of my brokenness. I saw your faces, heard your words – loved you back with my little jogging spurt as best as I could. Because I am not a miracle of my own strength. I am a graced girl, loved healthy by a community who cared, by individuals who, by their own choice, became the hands and feet of the incarnation of the grace-giver of life and love himself, Jesus.   I …

The Truth About Joy {and how to have it}

And when I awaken in the shadows, the house breathing in all its darkness, feeling the very terror of spinning through space on this small planet and wondering…I remember joy. Joy in the storm, joy in the pain, joy in the moments when death loomed, joy in the simple words:

I’ve told you this so that you may have my joy and that your joy may be complete.

And I whisper in the dark: thank you.

A New Normal, A Better View

We slurped angel hair pasta with meat sauce for dinner at about 8:30. The TV joined us because we’ve been watching old episodes of Chuck. It was Wednesday night, which meant that the boys needed to put out the garbage for early morning pick-up. The laundry is a bit stacked up, the floors need mopping and I started a grocery list. All is normal at the Santos house. And I couldn’t be happier about that. All this normal. Well, it’s a dream come true for me. Anyone who knows me, who’s read much of this blog, knows that three years ago, our normal was shocked, interrupted by a drunk driver. The accident was near-fatal and although our kids miraculously walked away from the wreckage, the impact left Angelo trapped behind the steering wheel with a broken fibula and me, well, broken, in a lot of ways. Somehow my leg lay flung and awkward on the dashboard. I was immobile as I sat oddly in the passenger seat, wondering why breathing was becoming so difficult and …